The Final Post
I've moved my blog. From April onwards I will no longer be using Blogspot as the host of my blog. You can get the April version of my weblog here, and you can visit the index of weblogs here.

Good morning, and tata, see you on the other side.

  posted by Karcy R. @ 9:39 AM

 
The last day of March
Today, I talked to someone I didn't expect to talk to for several months. A relationship patched up - and this time, hopefully, things will be better.

Today, I decided that I can't call myself a Christian anymore. A Christian is a follower of Christ. I'm not. I'm still looking around, wondering if what is packaged and given to me as Christianity is for real. I'm not following Christ. I pray to Christ, yeah, but I haven't really followed Christ. Not yet.

Today, I got angry at God. Two years ago, I began to doubt my faith. At that time, I told God that I would start searching from there, and you know, I had faith that if God was real, God would give me a conviction so strong that I would not doubt Christianity again. That was my request. If God didn't, I would be honest to myself and just continue to be a seeker for whatever the truth was and not join Christianity simply because I was afraid of Hell. Heh, funny, that. Faith. It's been two years and God still hasn't answered. Instead, I found more reasons to doubt, I found more questions ringing in my head without satisfying answers from Christianity.

And to be honest, I'm frustrated. Frustrated and angry that after two years of looking I haven't found any fixed answer for or against Christianity.

And so I took to what I should have done earlier. I opened the Bible and started to investigate it. I opened Matthew, I checked up on Messianic prophecy Number One, and I admit that Isaiah's prophecy, while uncanny, seemed to refer to something else and not a saviour.

I heard from a friend of mine that five students died of a virus in Kuching. I don't know what virus it is. Could it be another outbreak?

I'm still worried about my UPU form.

It's been a mixed day.

  posted by Karcy R. @ 5:38 AM